“Change Your State; Change Your Story” is often quoted by Tony Robbins and what he is talking about is a radical, physical change. The first time I heard of this was prior to attending a Tony Robbins event where my son and I got to do a “Fire Walk.” The idea is simple: if you can change the voice in the head of someone (ourselves included), then that can produce a different “story” for them. Most of the times, for permanent change this does need to be a radical, physical change but sometimes a small change can alter our view and attitude in the moment.
For example, using this in a restaurant, it may be as easy as using the Escape Adulthood’s “Eat Dessert First” idea…order dessert prior to the meal (you take part of the meal home in a box anyway). A server taking the order will look at you funny as they question your real meaning to see whether you meant to order it first. They will undergo a change of state (their expectations, the other voices in their head) altering their thought patterns, if only for a moment. This might be enough to get over worries, irritations with unruly customers, or other concerns, thus changing their “story” and introducing a moment of lightness in their spirit.
Another example is to watch the people driving or riding in their cars on the highway. It is all too easy to see there are way too many serious people and not enough smiling faces on the road. Car dancing, singing (badly in my case), having strange stickers on the car, or just laughing or smiling big can change the state of other drivers. I imagine there are drivers who would not appreciate levity in the car and could get irritated at what they may take as a personal attack on their person or attitude but the few that respond…who are helped by a bit of flippancy…make it all worthwhile.
Purposeful changing the state of others will always be a two-edged sword…how much to “push” or “steer” others’ thoughts without a perceived offense or making a situation worse. So, the best idea, is to note the attitude of those around us and then focus on who we need to be to have a change of state…in ourselves. By changing our state (how we see and hear others), we can change the story for us and indirectly for others…and change it for the better. It will combat seriousness with playfulness.
That’s the whole point too: to step away, if only for a moment, from the seriousness of everything and introduce a bit of humor and light-heartedness into our lives. And because there will always be those who want to let us know how dismal and dreadful the world is; it is up to us to note their comments but keep our hearts open to possibilities.
So, say “No” today to the seriousness of it all and go change the state of someone today (make it YOU first ?).