I took our cat to the vet today and the only sane way to do that was to put him in our carry crate (aka cat carrier but we call it a crate). Needless to say, he was not a happy camper. He howled and cried all the way to the veterinarian and all the way back home.
And I can understand his dilemma and fear. You might ask me “How?”. Do I speak fluent cat? Could I read the concern in his eyes? Did I embrace him through empathy?
Well, then how?
Oh. Another life lesson taught by our surroundings. Though secure within his crate, he was also confined by it.
I (and if I mistakenly type in “we” please forgive me) am a creature of crates. The box within a box I live in (my room, my house), the crate within a crate I worked in (semi-open cubicle city in a large building), the container within container I operate from (my beliefs, values, perceptions, experiences), and the space within space I exist (my personal space within the larger (his)story of life). Enough analogies and metaphors? Perhaps but the bottom-line is I felt (and feel) secure within my crate(s).
And the real reason for these “ah-ha” visions is how plaintively my cat cried while in his crate…and how much I cry, wail, throw tantrums, embrace impatience, and feel overwhelmed and depressed by the self-made, self-chosen crates I have lived and still exist within.
So, I’m here to say “Crap to Crates” or perhaps “Lemme Out” or to quote an old song “Don’t Fence Me In.” And to do that I need to find out what made me revel within my confines…was it one of the many fears – security (fear of risk or failure), comfort (fear of living life), contentment (fear of being brave or adventurous), or rules (fear of breaking some unwritten or written word)?
Or maybe it was happiness, joy, peace, and … right. Not a chance. If it were, I would not be looking at my crate and yowling up a storm.
And I do feel like I am yowling, howling and meowing a good bit of the time (bad perception?).
I do appreciate what the crates have done for me (got me from there to here, then to now, insecure to a false sense of security but security nonetheless) but I think it’s time to open the door on my crates and step outside.
Who knows what I’ll find?
…especially if I avoid other crates discovered and made along the way.